Three friends decided to go hunting together. One was a lawyer, one a doctor, and the other a preacher. As they were walking, along came a big buck. The three of them shot at the same time and the buck dropped immediately. The hunting party rushed to see how big it actually was. Upon reaching the fallen deer, they found out that it was dead but had only one bullet hole.A debate followed concerning whose buck it was. When a game warden came by, he offered to help. A few moments later, he had the answer.He said with much confidence, "The pastor shot the buck!" The friends were amazed that he could determine that so quickly and with so little examination. The game warden just smiled. "It was easy to figure out. The bullet went in one ear and out the other."
A crumbling old church building needed remodeling, so, during his sermon, the preacher made an impassioned appeal looking directly at the richest man in town. At the end of the sermon, the rich man stood up and announced, "Pastor, I will contribute $1,000."
Just then, plaster fell from the ceiling and struck the rich man on the shoulder.
He promptly stood back up and shouted, "Pastor, I will increase my donation to $5,000."
Before he could sit back down, plaster fell on him again, and again he virtually screamed, "Pastor, I will double my last pledge."He sat down, and a larger chunk of plaster fell on his head.
He stood up once more and hollered, "Pastor, I will give $20,000!"
This prompted a deacon to shout, "Hit him again, Lord! Hit him again!"
A minister dies and is waiting in line at thePearly Gates. Ahead of him is a guy who's dressedin sunglasses, a loud shirt, leather jacket, andjeans.
Saint Peter addresses this guy, "Who are you, sothat I may know whether or not to admit you tothe Kingdom of Heaven?"
The guy replies, "I'm Joe Cohen, taxi-driver, ofNoo Yawk City."
Saint Peter consults his list. He smiles and saysto the taxi-driver, "Take this silken robe andgolden staff and enter the Kingdom of Heaven."
The taxi-driver goes into Heaven with his robe andstaff, and it's the minister's turn. He standserect and booms out, "I am Joseph Snow, pastor ofSaint Mary's for the last forty-three years."
Saint Peter consults his list. He says to theminister, "Take this cotton robe and wooden staffand enter the Kingdom of Heaven."
"Just a minute," says the minister. "That man was ataxi-driver and he gets a silken robe and golden staff.How can this be?"
"Up here, we work by results," says Saint Peter."While you preached, people slept; while he drove,people prayed."
