Will You Marry Me ?

There were these two elderly people living in a Florida mobile home park. He was a widower and she a widow. They had known one another for a number of years. Now, one evening there was a community supper in the big activity center. These two were at the same table, across from one another. As the meal went on, he made a few admiring glances at her and finally gathered up his courage to ask her, "Will you marry me?"

After a dramatic pause and precisely six seconds of 'careful consideration,' she answered. "Yes. Yes, I will."

The meal ended and with a few more pleasant exchanges and they went to their respective places.

Next morning, he was troubled. "Did she say 'yes' or did she say 'no'?"

He couldn't remember. Try as he would, he just could not recall. Not even a faint memory. With trepidation, he went to the telephone and called her.

First, he explained to her that he didn't remember as well as he used to. Then he reviewed the lovely evening past. As he gained a little more courage, he then inquired of her, "When I asked if you would marry me, did you say 'Yes' or did you say 'No'?"

He was delighted to hear her say, "Why, I said, 'Yes, yes I will' and I meant it with all my heart."

Then she continued, "And I am so glad that you called, because I couldn't remember who had asked me."

A Guy Goes To See The Doctor

A guy goes to see the doctor, because he's a little too well-endowed. In fact, it's 25 inches long and he can't get any women to have sex with him. 
Anyway, the doctor says there's nothing he can do medically, but recommends a witch doctor that he thinks might be able to help. 
The witch doctor takes a look at the problem and tells him to go to a particular pond, deep in the forest, and talk to a frog that lives there. "Ask the frog to marry you and each time the frog says no, you'll be 5 inches shorter." 
Worth a try, he thinks, and off he dashes into the forest. He finds the pond and sees the frog on the other side, sitting on a log. "Frog, will you marry me?" 
The frog looks at him, disinterested at best, and calls back, "No." 
The guy looks down and sure enough, he's 5 inches shorter. Hey, this is great he thinks -- let's try that again. "Will you marry me?" 
The frog rolls his eyes, and shouts back again, "No!" 
Zappo! -- the guy's down to 15 inches. Well, that's still a bit excessive, he thinks. Down another 5 would be perfect. So he calls across again, "Frog, will you marry me?" 
The irritated frog yells back, "Look..how many times do I have to tell you? No, No, NO!"

Elderly Man Of 80 Years

There was the elderly man of 80 years who told his doctor that he was about to marry a 20-year-old. The doctor said, "That's great", but thinking of the young bride, said, "Why don't you also take in a young boarder after you get married."

The man said, "That's a great idea, Doc. We'll do just that."

A few months later, the Doctor saw the 80-year-old man, and asked him how he was, and how was his marriage to the young wife?

The man replied, "Fine Doc. And she's fine, too. As a matter of fact, she's pregnant!"

The Doctor smiled, and asked, "And how is the young boarder?"

The man replied, "Oh, she's pregnant, too."