A blind man was describing his favorite sport, parachuting. When asked how this was accomplished, he said that things were all done for him: "I am placed in the door with my seeing eye dog and told when to jump. My hand is placed on my release ring for me and out I go with the dog."
"But how do you know when you are going to land?" he was asked. "I have a very keen sense of smell, and I can smell the trees and grass when I am 300 feet from the ground" he answered.
"But how do you know when to lift your legs for the final arrival on the ground?" he was again asked. He quickly answered: "Oh, the dog's leash goes slack."
Two golfing friends were about to tee off, when one fellow noticed thathis partner had but one golf ball.
"Don't you have at least one other ball?", he asked.
"Nope, I only need one ball."
"Are you sure? What happens if you lose that one?"
"This is a very special golf ball. You can't lose it, so I don't needanother one."
"What do you mean you can't lose it! What happens if you slice your shotand the ball goes in the lake?"
"That's okay, this special golf ball senses when it's under water and itputs out a steam of bubbles. I'll be able to retrieve it. You can't losethis ball"
"Well what happens if you hit it into the long rough?"
"No problem, you see, this ball can detect the long grass and it sends uppuffs of fluorescent smoke. I'll be able to see it easily. You can't losethis ball"
Exasperated, the friend asks, "Okay. Let's say our game goes late, the sungoes down, and you hit your ball deep into the trees and it gets lostamong the bushes and shrubs?. What are you going to do then?"
"That's okay too. You see, this special ball can sense the darkness and itmakes a beeping sound. I'll be able to get it back - no problem."
Finally satisfied that he needs only the one amazing golf ball, the friendasks, "Hey, where did you get a golf ball like that anyway?"
"I found it."
